IT'S LIKE SPAM, BUT THEN FROM ME!

Today’s grinding gears are about traffic. I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s noticed the decline in common sense of the average traffic participant nowadays. I’m not really sure what’s going on in the minds of people I come across while I’m driving around. Seriously, the stupidity is sometimes frighteningly close to plain insanity. The thing is, there’s a couple of ‘types’ of people, certain behavioral characteristics particular traffic participants have that clearly disconnects them from what is known as ‘normal and acceptable’. And I think sometimes it’s a bit of a vicious circle, that one behavior triggered a somewhat more extreme reaction which then again triggers a more aggressive response, and so on. Let me try to list the ones that bother me most, and if you know any other, feel free to add them in the comments.

1. The ones where turn signals must have been an option on the car they couldn’t afford. Or maybe they’re being economical with the usage of the light bulbs in these times of crisis. I mean really. How hard can it be to hit that little handle when you switch lanes? These are not meant for your own amusement. The turn signal is meant to ’signal’ (get it?) to other people around you that you are about to do something funny like switching lanes, or overtaking someone, or heading for a parking spot. Many other examples. But no. Driving 120km/h, you switch lanes to and fro, not realizing the chaos you cause behind you. You also make everyone hold and wait because you refuse to signal you’re about to leave the roundabout. So the opposite lane moves slower because the first car had to wait and see what you would do.
   
   
2. The ones who feel privileged and above the rules of traffic. So, it’s rush hour and everyone is lining up, two lanes need to merge to one, or the highway splits directions, as the road signs signal. You pretend to not notice the fact everyone is lining up. All of the sudden, 50 meters before the merging point, you pretend to have forgotten you actually had to go the other way, so you force yourself in the line, ignoring the fact everyone else was queuing. Except, you pass there every day. You know damn well everyone is lining up, but you’re special. You have special needs. I admire you, every day.
   
   
3. The ones who drive in the fast lane but not at maximum speed. It’s not an attempt to make people break the speeding limits on a highway and get fined, but seriously, if you’re overtaking someone on the middle lane and you move to the fast lane, that means you have to step up a little. Especially when you notice a lot of cars queuing up behind you. But that’s idle hope. You don’t use the rearview mirror anyway, do you? It’s called fast lane for a reason though. If you’re driving 100km/h and you want to overtake a truck that’s driving 95 km/h while he’s overtaking a truck in the slow lane that drives 90 km/h, please don’t do it during rush hour. A lot of people really have to be somewhere.
   
   
4. The ones who drive 50km/h on a 70km/h road. I just have one thing to say: if the road ahead of you is clear and behind you is a 20-car line, you’re not doing it right.
   
   
5. The suicide hijabs with a stroller. You’re smoothly cruising around, paying attention to traffic. All of the sudden from the corner of your eye you notice the sidewalk, you see the mother with baby-carriage that was walking straight ahead take a turn and push the carriage firmly forward upon the road area. You hit the brakes and slam it hard. Not even paying attention to what just happened, mother and stroller cross the street, cell-phone stuck between the hijab and their ear, busy talking. It just comes to my attention that – and I assume it’s a cultural thing if you compare the state of traffic between ours and these specific foreign countries – they move through traffic more assertively than you’d expect from a pedestrian. Really unpredictable.
   
   
6. The ones who cause traffic jams out of impatience. You’re in a slow moving traffic lane and approaching traffic lights. Normal people anticipate with a thinking process that roughly goes like this: hmm, it’s been green for while, might turn red soon. Crossroad is not empty yet, if I move now, chances are I end up in the middle of the crossing, blocking all traffic. But no. You decide to move ahead. The light is green, you are entitled to your progress. Then, as predicted, the light turns red and you are blocking all lanes. You try to ignore it, make your car move very slowly towards the bumper of the car ahead of you, trying to make it look like you want to move but the car ahead of you is not allowing you to. Then the light turns green again for your lane, people behind you have to wait for the crossroad to clear up again and find themselves stuck with a red light again. But hey, you made your progress, didn’t you?
   
   
7. Cyclists that rule the road. I know cycling conditions are not optimal, and I respect that. Some streets are suicide to ride on. But. Making people hit the brakes because you decided to drive through one-way lanes and then acting like you’re being legit, that seriously grinds my gears. It’s a one way lane. As a driver and user of that lane, I do not have to precalculate you taking short cuts and drive too close to the parked cars on the one side to let you pass on the other. Get off the bike and walk on the sidewalk. Normal people do that. It’s ok, really.
   
   
8. The ones who are too lame to park. I have all the human understanding in the world you only quickly want to stop at the night store. And I know you’re legally entitled to stop in your lane if you hit your turn signal. But seriously. If you would drive 10 extra meters, there would’ve been enough room to park. But then you’d have to walk back to the store which would at least set you back 15 seconds.
   
   
9. The ones who need two parking spots. We all imagine we drive limousines once in a while, but seriously, your car ain’t that big. It’s nice you have a parking spot and I recognize the importance of your persona and the fact that such a big ego comes with the rights that entitle you to ‘more space’ to live and thus park. I’m sorry to have brought this up, your majesty. But your short-sighted and ignorant behavior really pisses me off when I’m looking for a place to park as well.
   
   
10. The ones that cross the road without even paying attention to what’s happening. Coming from behind a bus or parked van or truck, thinking: “cars have to brake, I’m a pedestrian, they have to let me pass anyways”. Yes, theoretically. But there are limits to anticipation. It’s not because you’re too lame to go cross the street 20 meters down the road at the pedestrian crossing I’m focusing on, it’s because you’re expected to not bring yourself in danger by throwing yourself in front of the oncoming traffic just because you suddenly feel the urge to cross the street. And take that angry mumbling look off your face as you cross the street. It’s a road. Cars drive there. It’s not my fault you decide to cross the street without paying attention.
    
    

I think that about sums up the things I can think of right now. Maybe just one more, now that it’s been snowing here in Flanders: the ones who blatently ignore barred lanes because they don’t want to queue up and because there’s snow over the lanes, they think: if I can’t see it, it’s not here. Is it just me or are all the examples above a not-so-shiny image of how people are starting to be become more and more selfish and egocentric?

Picture from Flickr user PDXdj

That really grinds my gears.

We’ve all been there. The good old office prank. Not that we don’t have a job to do, but seriously, if you can’t have a laugh while being productive, you should consider changing jobs. Early September, I got pranked by Sam(@samzzi), the coding/production dude of TheseDays. I have to admit, it was a decent prank. He’d put some time and effort in it, well respectable, and decided to color my desk pink, including accessories. That result has been put online and for a little while (about 3 months) he had his days of glory. Look at the spark of the unborn revenge:

Nice one, Sam. Hope you enjoyed the little victory laps. Now it’s time for payback. I’ve planned it a bit and here’s what it took:

• 6 sqm of grass
• 1 bag of groundcovering wood snippets
• 1 bag of dry grass
• 1 kilo of rabbit food
• 1 midget rabbit with flappy ears
• 1 open metal box
• a couple of plants
• tiny drinking bowl
• 8 sqm of groundcovering plastic

Here’s how it all came to the office (pictures and vid by @donotfold) :

So, I collected all the goodies, parked my car out of sight, but I had to wait until Sam left:

Spread out the plastic, rolled out and sliced the grass, put up the little fence to keep the rabbit from going anywhere else in the office and decorate Sam’s mini garden with some extra plants and wood snippets. And in the end: release Lappy. The guy in the last picture is @ActiveLife aka Johan DK. He was kind enough to lend a well-appreciated hand emptying the car and settings things up.

Now that’s a prank.

(Flemish) – Ik heb er ook zo één. Een digicorder van Telenet. Al dik veel plezier aan gehad, ‘t is echt een gemak. Maar er zijn zo een paar dingetjes die volgens mij toch nog beter kunnen. Het zullen misschien details lijken, maar verdekke, qua usability zou het er wel een pak op vooruit gaan.

De TV zenders maken een programmatie op. Daarin schikken ze strategischerwijs wat voor soort programma’s op welk uur van de dag worden uitgezonden. Die programmatie houdt rekening met reclameblokken (of zou dat moeten doen), hoewel dat niet apart in het dagschema wordt opgenomen. In de tv-gids zal dus nooit staan:

18.00 – 18.05 reclame met MB, Mattel, Matchbox, Mattel, iets met robots en Dash,…
18.05 – 18.15 Deel 1 programma
18.15 – 18.20 reclame met MB, Mattel, Matchbox, Mattel, iets met robots en Dash,…
18.20 – 18.30 Deel 2 programma

Hierdoor denkt 98% van de kijkers dat ‘The Simpsons’ een half uur duurt, maar dat is dan reclame inbegrepen, want de eigenlijke show duurt 21 minuten ongeveer; aftiteling inbegrepen.
Soms zijn de reclameblokken langer. In prime-time bijvoorbeeld, of tussen oktober en maart om de kindjes zot te maken van speelgoed voor de Sint, en Kerst en Nieuw en hun communies. Alle begrip daarvoor, want zo werkt het nu eenmaal, de kindjes moeten kunnen spelen. Maar bon, die langere reclameblokken, dat is ook te voorzien en te plannen.
Dus. De planning wordt opgemaakt en doorgegeven aan alle boekjes en kranten, websites én digitale programmatie agenda’s van ter zake doende instanties, waaronder Telenet.
Die nemen de content integraal over, dat lijkt me zeer voor de hand liggend. En tóch klopt dat niet met hoe het bij mij thuis aankomt.

Een voorbeeld. Ik kijk in de digitale gids en ik zie een programma dat start om 18u. Zo staat het ook in de Humo, dus het moét gewoon waar zijn, en alles lijkt peis en vree. Ik stel de opname in via het menu in de veronderstelling dat alles wel zal worden opgenomen en dat ik blij en gemoedelijk ter mijner gezwinde tijden zal kunnen genieten van mijn opgenomen lekkers.
-insert time leap here-
Dus, ik kijk in mijn tv-theek en zie mijn opnames staan. En nu zijn er drie scenario’s die zich potentieel ontwikkelen:

1. Scenario 1: het begint mooi op tijd en er is nog een stukje achteraan van een ander programma. Geen stress. Dit gebeurt ook wel eens. Spijtig genoeg veel te weinig.
2. Scenario 2: Dit is het meest frequente scenario. Ik moet vaak tot een kwartier voortspoelen. Altijd dat gezever met te ver of te vroeg. Eindelijk juist afgestemd en ik kan beginnen kijken. Het programma bereikt zijn climax. Ik had ingesteld om tot 10 minuten na einde programma op te nemen, maar het uitzendschema is meer dan tien minuten vertraagd en ik mis nét de pointe van de episode. Frustratie.
3. Scenario 3: Het programma is al bezig. De uitzending loopt voor op het schema dat Telenet weergeeft. Intro en vaak elementaire scenes van de episode ontbreken. Kan ik evengoed stoppen met kijken. Frustratie.

Dat is dus het probleem. Wat zijn nu de oorzaken?

Ik herinner me dat ik vroeger, toen alles nog eenvoudiger was met VHS en gewone videorecorders, een nummer kon intoetsen op de afstandsbediening, en dat nummer hoorde toe aan een programma, en dat stond in ‘de boekskes’ bij de programmabeschrijving. En als het tv-signaal met die nummer binnenkwam, dan begon dat op te nemen. Toen kon dat wel. Analoog. Of ik moest vree fout zijn, dat kan ook. Ik was namelijk niet zo oud en er werd eigenlijk ook niet teveel opgenomen bij ons thuis. Of het moest iets met Mark Uytterhoeven zijn.

En nu, digitaal, nu moet mijn opname gelinkt zijn aan een blokje in een tijdsschema, ongeacht of dat klopt met de uitzending die dag. Het moet toch perfect mogelijk zijn om dat digitaal af te stemmen, zodat het klopt. Ligt dat aan Telenet? Ja en nee.
Ja, want eigenlijk kunnen die digitale programma’s beter aangeleverd worden. In deze tijd is het toch niet normaal dat je met een digicorder en HD televisie opnameopties moet instellen als ‘x minuten vóór beginnen’ en ‘xx minuten na eindigen’. Da’s digitaal man! Dat is pérfect te timen.
Nee, want ongeacht de hierboven opgesomde ‘echte’ uurregeling, loopt het dus bij de televisie soms wel anders. Eigenlijk is het meer zo:

17.59 – 18.04 reclame met MB, Mattel, Matchbox, Mattel, iets met robots en Dash,…
18.04 – 18.06 Aankondiging, dienstmededeling, pancarte of clip van speciale sponsor
18.06 – 18.16 Deel 1 programma
18.16 – 18.21 reclame met MB, Mattel, Matchbox, Mattel, iets met robots en Dash,…
18.21 – 18.31 Deel 2 programma en aftiteling
18.31 – 18.36 reclame met MB, Mattel, Matchbox, Mattel, iets met robots en Dash,…

enzovoort

En daardoor komt er op de duur tot een kwartier vertraging, waardoor ik uiteindelijk in scenario 2 terecht kom, zoals hierboven vermeld. Eigenlijk zou ik een hele dag van begin tot einde uitzending naar een zender moeten kijken om te timen waar het nu precies fout gaat, maar die tijd heb ik niet, dus ik waag een gokje:

Volgens mij is de lengte van de reclameblokken ook heel variabel. Misschien zijn er dagen dat er zo weinig ingekocht wordt, en dat er minder lange aankondigingen zijn ofzo, zodat er ineens ingelopen wordt, en dan komen we in scenario 3 terecht, en is het programma al bezig op het ogenblik de Telenet digicorder in de tv-gids bij de ‘oorspronkelijke’ start aankomt en begint op te nemen. En als er dus goed verkocht is, dan is er meer reclame en lopen de programma’s uit.

Dat gedoe heb ik dus meestal voor op zenders die leven van reclame-inkomsten. De staatszenders zijn hier betrouwbaarder in, Canvas vooral. Met ‘den BRT’ loopt het al wat vaker mis. Het ligt dus vermoedelijk aan de zender, maar ik vind dat ik in deze tijden meer mag verwachten van een service provider als Telenet. Zeker als je over de plas kijkt en de mogelijkheden van TiVo even onder de loep neemt. Ik spring hier niet op de barricade voor het automatisch overslaan van reclameblokken tijdens de opname, hoewel dat technisch gezien ook al lang kan. Ik wil gewoon de weinige disk space die ik krijg niet verliezen aan nutteloze minuten voor en na programma’s. Als ik iets wil opnemen dan wil dat zeggen dat wat ervoor komt of erna me niet boeit.

Dat brengt me dus bij het volgende punt. Ik wil kunnen editen. Simpel tijdlijntje zoals in MovieMaker, ik zet streepjes ‘van hier tot daar wil ik bijhouden’ en de rest mag weg. Crop. Delete. Het is een digicorder, in Gods naam. Digi! Dat is echt een must voor de volgende versie. Minstens. Het is niet meer van deze tijd om troep bij te houden. Net zoals 100 GB peanuts is als je bvb een serie wil opnemen in plaats van de occasionele film. Need. More. Space. Terra drives. Ik heb een abonnement voor 100 zenders, maar ik moet constant dingen wissen die ik eigenlijk wou bijhouden. Moet ik dan écht nog een aparte DVD writer kopen om alsnog dingen te kunnen archiveren voor eigen gebruik? Gun me dan minstens het recht om onder DRM voorwaarden bestanden te kunnen backuppen. Of begin een lijn met externe drives ofzo.

Die digicorder hangt op de netwerk kabel die uit de switch komt. Uit dezelfde switch gaat een kabeltje naar de draadloze router waar de Xbox op hangt en de laptops en de desktop en de server. Waarom kan ik die digicorder niet mee in mijn netwerk hangen en de content erop zo vanop andere locaties bewerken, beheren? Dat zou leuk zijn. Minder realistisch, dat besef ik ook. Maar ik was nu toch al bezig…

En last but not least. Als ik twee programmas na elkaar wil opnemen, dan mag dat voor mij 1 blok zijn. De optie ‘verder kijken’ is er namelijk, dus ik kan het zelf wel aan denk ik. Zeker met het hele circus uit scenario 2 wordt dat bijna slapstick:

Programma heeft vertraging, dus voortspoelen. x2 -> x64. Proberen mikken. Te ver. Al een stukje verrassingseffect weg want ik heb de eerste halve minuut al versneld zien voorbij flitsen. Terugspoelen. Niet te traag want anders is de verrassing er helemaal af. Oei. Te ver teruggespoeld. Laatste beetje reclame zien en hup we zijn vertrokken. Na tien minuten: reclame. Spoelen. Te ver. (etc) dan halverwege of bijna ten einde deel 2: programma afgebroken. Pointe staat in het stuk van het aansluitende programma. Stoppen, uit de opname gaan terug naar de menu. Nieuwe opname selecteren, beginnen afspelen.

Dat is toch te gek voor woorden. Ik zit met twee opgenomen programma’s op mijn digicorder waarvan meer dan de helft van de eerste opname een programma is dat ik niet wou zien, en waardoor ik de tweede opname zeker moet bijhouden als ik nog iets of wat genot wil hebben aan die eerste opname, die werd afgebroken voor ze ten einde was. Met een beetje pech heb ik het einde van de tweede opname niet, vanwege de vertraging die het uitzendschema had.

Ik wijs niet met vingers hier. Of misschien een beetje, maar dan niet beschuldigend. Ik zit gewoon met een redelijk prijzig product dat eigenlijk niet het gemak levert waar ik van wil genieten in deze tijd, met de huidige technologische voorzieningen. En dat heeft dus verschillende oorzaken.

Sometimes you see things on the internet that just really amaze you. A while ago I came across this wicked 3D walkthrough of a frozen moment in a robbery scene that seems to have no real branded message. However, some quick searching revealed that it was actually the Philips Carousel Commercial by Adam Berg for the (at that time) new Phillips 21:9 TV. I’m really impressed by the entire movie scene setup, and also with the integrated amiblight demo on the website. This is exactly what a cinematic experience is all about. You get sucked into the scenes, you become part of the movies you’re watching. Over and over again (which is probably why the infinite loop is present on the website as well). This must have cost a fortune to make but it’s getting pretty close to what perfection looks like, so the return is priceless. Mister Berg. You, Sir, have a remarkable twisted mind. Wow.

The first time I saw the movie, I thought it was a virtual setting, completely ‘fake’, so to speak. And then on the website I saw the director, the director of photography and the VFX supervisor step in the scene and interact with the actors. And if you pay really close attention in the ‘behind the scene’ cuts, you see how all the objects are hung on wires, even the limbs of the (to my counting powers) 60 actors. This multiplies the awesome factor by at least eleven.

The clip is hosted at http://www.cinema.philips.com/ if you want to get some hi-def try-outs for your own cinematic pleasure.

I first joined YouTube when it was just a few months old, and I’d spend days and days uploading all the videos I came across on the web, just to have them all in one place. But then in May 2006 I closed my account because the service became waaaay too slow because of the increase of popularity (which for YouTube was a good thing, I agree). A little while later my account was deleted because of a cofyright infringement things. Well, actually an advertising agency asked YouTube to take down the clip I had uploaded because they owned the rights to it. It was an awareness clip to prevent drunk driving. That was my strike three at YouTube, so I got banned and all content got removed. Back then, agencies were not really aware yet of the power of social networks, I guess. So they didn’t like extra publicity. Anyway long story short, I joined again a while ago and I have to agree now that Google has taken the wheel stuff is going smooth as a baby’s behind. A couple of hours of tubing every here and there, I archived all the video pages I had bookmarked for reference in a dedicated fav folder.

The most interesting playlist when it comes to the field of my professional activities, and I assume that’s the reason why you’re here, is the Memes playlist. I’ve archived 86 YouTube memes over time. These are -the- clips that have caused spikes in traffic to the site, things that were hugely popular and some got hundreds of video responses from members of the YouTube community. Often they are remarkable news facts or just downright stupid things. Others are just ‘epic’. Obviously I’m not going to embed all clips in this post, but I’ll line up the text links to the video pages. I have not listed them by popularity, fyi.

I’ve compiled the list for me as a reference, just to browse them every once in a while when I’m looking for an inspirational spark.

The disturbing news to us, marketeers, is that if a company or brand asks you: “What would be the best viral for YouTube?”, you can answer them straight away: it would have to be something that features a crossbreed between a kitten, a hamster, a chipmunk and a panda- and it should at least ride a unicycle. Preferably it can breakdance and laugh while it is dressed up as tron guy or Rick Astley.
And now the challenge is to find a way to link that to a product.

Chocolate Rain

Charlie The Unicorn

Diet Coke + Mentos

Numa Numa

2 Guys + System Of A Down

Peanut Butter Jelly Time

Yatta!

Star Wars Kid

The whistles go… whoo whoo

Dramatic Chipmunk

G.I. Joe Pork Chop Sandwich

Skateboarding Dog

David After Dentist

RickRoll’D

Shining

Gangsta Barney

Winnebago Man

All Your Base Are Belong To Us

Boom Goes The Dynamite

Where The Hell Is Matt?

Leprechaun in Mobile Alabama

Bert & Ernie Gangsta Rap

Christian the Lion

PowerThirst

Baby Breakdance

Apple ad: Drunk Jeff Goldblum

Scarlet takes a tumble

Britain’s got talent: Susan Boyle

Gay Mount Everest

Afro Ninja

Orgeon’s Exploding Whale

I’m The Juggernaut Bitch

Laughing Baby

Leave Britney Alone!

Tron Guy

Cop shoots himself in the leg

Spaghetti Cat

Miss Teen 2007 USA

The Pet Pengiun

Student Tasered in Florida

Bill O’Reilly flips

Take On Me – Literal video

Tom Cruise kills Oprah

Little Superstar

Chad Vader S1E1 – A Galaxy not so far away

Pretty much everywhere

Zombie Kid likes turtles

Who Needs A Movie?

Look at that horse

Flea Market Montgomery

Hitler plans Burning Man

Aussie Party

Hawaii Chair infomercial

Jake E. Lee Shreds

Asian Back Street Boys

Leeroy Jenkins

Pinky the cat

Monkey Finger Sniff

Sneezing Baby Panda

Thriller Choreo

La pequena prohibida

Matrix Ping Pong

Katana sword commercial goes wrong

Kitten Surprise, how to break up a cat fight

Best Wedding Song Ever – Amy’s Song

Techno Viking, the original

HyperActive Lasse Gjertsen

Daft Hands

Battle At Kruger

OK GO – Here it goes again

Evolution Of Dance

Angry German Kid

Guiness World Record: Most T-Shirts

Floating dog in a plane

Chubby cuppy cake boy

George Washington

Scary Maze Prank

Gay Funny Referee

Hamster on a piano

Robot Chicken – Grand Theft Mario

Social Media Addicts

Facebook in real life

Reporter turns ghetto in 3

Bear trampoline

Jizz in my pants

Tea Partay

And eventually, as my buddy Kris already posted earlier, if you don’t have time to see them all, here’s the famous viral: 100 greatest internet videos in 3 minutes. It covers about 70% of the list above. It adds quite a few epic others that weren’t in my list though.

I believe very much in the power of self-fulfilling prophecies. I believe that you can train your mind to want things, a bit like forcing yourself to orden your thoughts and to shape clear and detailed images of what exactly it is you want to achieve, and more specificly when you want to be at that place. I’m one of these guys that stands in front of the mirror in the morning telling himself: “Dude, you’re doing great! Keep it up! It’s gonna be a super day!”.

[via]

Positive thinking, visualizing goals and not worrying about the steps and the maybes in between now and where I’m heading for. Getting there, I’ll solve whatever issue crosses my path. There’s no use trying to come up with reasons why it can fail, you can dedicate that energy to actually move on instead of spending time figuring out solutions for problems that might not even occur.

I recently started attending a 9-week seminar that builds on the rules of The Secret, a self-help and spirituality book written by Rhonda Byrne. The tenet of the book is that an individual’s focused positive thinking can result in life-changing experiences such as increased wealth, health, happiness and more. The seminar is more based on the methodology as passed on by Bob Proctor. Here in Belgium, the seminars based on the seminars based on the book based on the facts of life are woven around the captive story of Inge Rock. And I have to say, if you look passed all the marketing that surrounds the topic and you actually focus on the essence of what all these books are saying, what you already know is right, it works. The thing is, I just needed some freshing up on how exactly to do this in a constructive way instead of randomly every once in a while.

Sometimes the best examples of consumer interaction are hidden in the simplicity of the result of successive and collaborative actions. Yet, when you offer consumers the opportunity to open up  the dialogue, it can occur the feedback channels are not always serving the purposes they’ve been created for. Even worse, the examples of brands with failed efforts to start the conversation are hic et ubique. You can invent and plot an entire ’social’ masterplan to engage with your audience and still find yourself left with empty boxes just because the initial spark that had to set things in motion was missing. Most of the times though, when looking at the popular memes on the web, the global succes of a viral effect originates quite often from ‘accidental fame’.

Accidental fame can be the cumulative result of something funny, epic or just plainly remarkable which a lot of people can relate to. Something you instantly want to share with others. Something unbelievable, something unique or maybe even something downright silly. The hardest part being a strategist is to sometimes convince some brands that in their specific campaign, or for their specific product, for their budget,… the hopes for a social viral should not be nurished, simply because their product isn’t inviting enough for the larger section of ‘the internet people’ (the target audience segment is too narrow), or the message of the campaign is not inviting enough to start a grassroots revolution. Looking at the most popular memes around, very little of them have been invented by advertising people. Most of them are not related to a brand or company, nor do they serve a marketing purpose. And still…

The challenge to create something remarkable that will travel around fast and virally is exactly hidden in the gray zone, where good creatives come up with ideas that get traction. Because sometimes a good campaign goes viral exactly because it’s a good campaign. A great idea, perfect visuals, the perfect scenario. Every once in a while you find that ultimate concept, that superb tune or catchline. But the combination of the circumstances that lead to this successful action are not part of everyday life. It might be hard to grasp it, but seriously. The world would be a boring place if everything was equally popular. Standing out means being remarkable. You can’t be remarkable all day. There seems to be an idée fixe at brand representatives and companies that has put then in the comfortable position of expecting to receive the pot with gold everytime they poop out a rainbow.

Let’s take a look at some of the misconceptions brands have when they contact an advertising agency:

1. The briefing contains the words ’social’, ‘viral’ or ‘like brand x but better’, so the results will be alike.
2. Social Media (networks, services,…) is  free, or at least very cheap.
3. People all over the world love my brand already anyway, because I’m the best.
4. Social channels return instant brand popularity.
5. My brand will become the next hot thing overnight because I’m on Facebook.
6. Posting a YouTube clip, comments or content under a phony name will not backfire.
7. Omnipresence on all available social media channels equals instant revenue.

Social is the new viral. True. But just wait a minute before you jump out of the frying pan. As the song goes, there might be a fire too, and songs rarely speak false truths. So here are some rules of thumb to help a brand or company along the way:

1. Social media is part of your regular media plan and should be treated like so. It needs budget, it needs attention and careful consideration. Yes. It needs a strategy and a concept.
2. ‘Do something social’ is an empty assignment. Copying from a successful competitor will not work the same for you as it did for them, because you can’t stage the circumstances in which the competitor launched his campaign.
3. It’s better to have a solid presence on one or two networks and maintain it for a couple of months than to wildly flood all social channels with your message. If you start from scratch, learn to crawl first before you start running. Positive brand perception takes a while to grow. It’s like credibility. You don’t have it just because you say so. You have it because others recognize you do.
4. If the thing you launched isn’t working, it might be your timing’s off, the message isn’t strong enough or what you try to do is lame. Or maybe something else is stealing your thunder because it’s better. Instant and overnight success are like winning the lottery. It happens, but rarely to the same people and pretty much always unscheduled.
5. A good campaign strategy is well-balanced. Cropping budget and cutting out things that seem useless because you don’t understand it completely will disturb the overall impact of the campaign. If you go for it, be prepared to go all the way. Cutting funds half-way the process jeopardizes the entire operation and will most likely result in disappointing campaign stats.
6. Being present on a social network is more than just pushing content. It means participating in conversations, facilitating conversations and above all: listening to what people say. There is nothing more shameful for a brand than dying social groups and pages that get their only traffic from an occiasional tumbleweed that drifts by. If you, as a brand or company decide to go social, that means someone inside your team will have to pick up this job and integrate it with other daily activities. Or you have to out-source it to your agency, if you feel like they understand your brand.